Let’s start with the Soul mate issue. When we hear the words “Soul Mate,” most people conjure up visions of that special someone specifically and miraculously molded and made for them and only them. Someone who understands us as no other person can. Like synchronized swimmers “Soul mates” are in tune and in rhythm with one another, navigating through any challenges in their relationship with ease and grace. They fit together like a puzzle. Now I ask you…seriously… do you know of any couples who fit that description? Um..hmm…that’s what I thought.
And where did this idea of Soul Mate originate from anyway? Here are two references: In Judaism, “bashert” is the Yiddish word meaning destiny. As it refers to Soul mate the words are basherte for female and basherter for male. From Wikipedia and according to Theosophy, God created androgynous souls—equally male and female. Those souls split into separate genders. Over a number of reincarnations, each half seeks the other. When all karmic debt is purged, the two will fuse back together and return to the ultimate
What about Karmic Connections? Karmic connections are said to originate from our Soul group connection from past lives. You know that feeling when you meet someone for the first time and you feel instantly and miraculously connected…or repelled. Whatever the reaction, we have shown up in each other’s life for a reason. And that reason is always ….yep…for our spiritual growth.
Some relationships show up and make us feel supported, unified and just plain happy. And in others we feel challenged, frustrated, angry and certain they were put on this earth to “torture” us. Actually, there is a bit of truth to that statement! The purpose of these karmic connections is to reveal to us our patterns and where we need to grow. I think we all can agree on one fundamental spiritual belief; in all of life, we are being presented with experiences and people who mirror our talents as well as our issues that we most need to work on for our spiritual growth.
What happens when we are entangled in a difficult romantic relationship and the question arises “Should I stay or should I go?” Most people might seek counseling or maybe group therapy to resolve their differences. However, for the person on a conscious spiritual path this decision is also burdened with metaphysical issues. If I leave: Am I abandoning a spiritual lesson? Am I destined to attract the same type of relationship?
Many years ago I debated this issue with a friend while in a group discussion. One person shared that he wanted to leave his marriage, feeling that he could no longer tolerate the abuse, which in his case was he spouse’s addiction to drugs and alcohol. My friend felt strongly that all relationships were purposeful and said “If you were in a relationship you should stay with it – no matter what and doggedly pursue the higher truth with that person,” I agree that all relationships are purposeful, but just as strongly disagreed with her reasoning. Sometimes the lesson is to learn how to let go, to be fearless, to learn to be independent, to learn discernment. There are just as many spiritual reasons to leave a relationship as there are to stay.
Relationships are very complicated and there is no one size fits all answer. However, I will say this: if a relationship involves any type of abusive behavior, be it addiction, verbal or physical, maybe your lesson is to develop self worth, self will and self love… and leave!
Our relationships are the way they are because we set them up that way in order to learn more about ourselves. Our relationships mirror what we believe we deserve and very often unconsciously. To be a little flip, if you are having challenges in any of your relationships, remember the one common denominator in all of them…..You.
My final comments as they refer to Soul mates and Karmic connections: I don’t believe we have only one Soul mate and I do believe we have lots of Karmic connections and in the end…. it is all about us and the opportunities to evolve spiritually. Live Miraculously!